1995 Royal Rumble

The intervals are down to 60 seconds this year. Pamela Anderson comes out as the Guest Time Keeper....or something like that. She gets to escort the winner down the aisle at Wrestlemania. #1 is The Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels. #2 is the British Bulldog. Shawn is on the attack before Bulldog can get his jacket off. Bulldog retorts with a back body drop and a huge gorilla press slam. Hot start for the Rumble as Bulldog brings the power and Shawn bumps his ass off in the process. #3 is Eli Blu, who is one of the Harris Twins/DOA with a full head of curly hair. Crowd does not care as he kicks away at the Bulldog. #4 is Duke the Dumpster Droese, who is met with a boot to the face from Eli. Duke actually had a decent run in the WWE, feuding with Triple H for a short time. Faded into obscurity after that. #5 is Jimmy Del Ray. Not exactly the most star studded Rumble, but this is 1995. #6 is Sionne of the Headshrinkers. He replaced Samu because, as WWF Magazine put it, Samu choked on a chicken bone. I believed that for years. The Bulldog eliminates Jimmy Del Ray. #7 is Dr. Tom Prichard, the other Heavenly Body. Sionne is about to toss Shawn but Shawn hangs tough. #8 is Doink, who finally gets a reaction out of the crowd. Nothing keeps happening except people keep coming in ridiculously fast. #9 is KWANG~! Holy shit, he lasted an entire year?! Vince is even fucking bored commentating. But before it can set in, we get another entrant. #10 is Rick Martel! Wow, I didn't think he made it to 1995. This is his 7th Royal Rumble, according to Vince.

#11 is Owen, but Bret attacks him on the ramp to a good pop. These two had such a great feud, a legendary feud...they should have fought for the WWF Championship at Wrestlemania XI. Owen is quickly tossed by the Bulldog when he got in. A shit load of people just went out. Duke Droese was dumped by HBK, Doink by Kwang, Timothy Well was in and out...hell EVERYONE is out but Shawn and the Bulldog, as #12 is Bushwhacker Luke, who quickly goes bye-bye by Shawn. #13 is Jacob Blu. He's back dropped by Shawn. #14 is King Kong Bundy, who attacked the Undertaker earlier in the night. Bundy hangs tough as #15 is Mo of Men on a Mission, who is quickly backdropped out by King Kong Bundy. #16 is Mabel who gets a good pop. Mabel and Bundy square off. Mabel tosses out Bundy as #17 is Bushwhacker Butch. And he's gone by Michaels, too. #18 is Lex Luger, who dumps Mabel. The Bulldog and Lex Luger are the Allied Powers at this point. #19 is MANTAUR! YES! HALF MAN, HALF BULL, MANTAUR! #20 is Aldo Montoya, who is Justin Credible under a mask. #21 is Henry Godwinn as nothing keeps happening. #22 is Billy Gunn who races into the ring as if he's going to do anything. He can't even eliminate Mantaur. NOBODY CAN! HE'S MANTAUR!!! #23 is Bart Gunn. #25 is Bob Backlund, former WWF Heavyweight Champion, to a chorus of boos. There's not enough time between entrants for nothing to happen. Bret Hart is back AGAIN, and attacks Bob Backlund on the outside. Crowd pops big for that, too.

#25 is Steven Dunn, as Luger clotheslines Backlund out. Bret and Backlund brawl on the ramp. #26 is Dick Murdoch?! 'Kay. #27 is Adam Bomb. He gets a good reaction. Adam Bomb as a face was pretty cool. #29 is Fatu. Luger eliminates Mantaur, sadly. I totally screwed up somewhere and missed a numbering. Whatever, it's irrelevant anyway. #30 is Crush. The Gunns eliminate each other. Aw, brotherly love. Aldo Montoya gets an elimination, taking out Steven Well. The Future Kronik is facing each other. Funny moment as Vince goes, "only one man can win," to which Lawler replies, "well last year, two men won!" Vince insures that that will NEVER happen again. Crush dumps his future tag team championship partner, Adam Bomb. Shawn launches Aldo Montoya out. Dick Murdoch tries to take out Shawn but Luger saves him for whatever reason. Even Lawler points out how dumb that is. Crush tosses out Fatu. Murdoch does an airplane spin on Godwinn and Shawn walks into it for a lol moment. Murdoch goes out when he tries to eliminate Henry. Luger dumps Godwinn.

Final four: Shawn Michaels, Crush, Lex Luger, and the British Bulldog. Crush dumps Luger to the surprise of the crowd. Shawn wants to team up with Crush to eliminate the Bulldog. Two heels on one face, again. They double team Shawn for a bit but Crush turns on him. He tries for a Gorilla Press Slam but ends up getting clotheslined out by the Bulldog, as the last two entrants in the Rumble are the first two. Bulldog is still full of vigor, nearly kneeing Shawn's face off. Shawn is still bumping his ass off, too. The Bulldog clotheslines Shawn RIGHT out, and the Bulldog thinks he won. Bulldog's music plays and he goes to the second turnbuckle to celebrate, but Shawn sneaks in from behind and hammers the Bulldog out. A legendary moment in Rumble history, as only ONE of Shawn Michaels' feet hit the floor. BOTH have to hit, so Shawn was never elimianted. Shawn Michaels wins.

This helped Shawn on his quest to the main event, and Shawn becomes the first man to enter at number 1 and win the entire Royal Rumble. Of course, this was the shortest Royal Rumble in history, so there's no longevity in there, but still, it was big at the time. As for the Rumble itself, it was at least fast paced, but there was nothing going on, ever. *1/2