1990 Royal Rumble

Right off the bat, the whole thing looks different. The presentation is much slicker, the crowd looks fuller. No theme music yet, sadly. Also, Fink knows who number 1 is, announcing him as number 30 from last year. They've changed it to where Fink doesn't say who it is until the music hits, to show he doesn't know either.

So Ted DiBiase is the first one, and number two is Koko B. Ware. An auspicious way to begin the Rumble, to be sure. DiBiase, clearly pissed at being number 1, attacks Koko before Koko can stand up in the ring. Interesting note, they've switched Gorilla Monsoon as commentator with Tony Schiavone. Koko makes a comeback, but really, it's Koko B. Ware. As such, Koko tries to clothesline DiBiase out, and gets back dropped. And in good timing, another wrestler is about to come out. Managers are apparently allowed to stay at ringside this year.

Number 3 is Marty Jannetty as the Rockers are still around. Crowd still loves them too. Marty is a house of fire but DiBiase slows that down with a boot to the face. Jannetty ducks DiBiase top rope attempts and gets the crowd on their feet again. He's still no match for DiBiase, who ducks a cross body attempt, as Marty Jannetty sails to the outside. Crowd does not like that, but in a good way. I was wrong, music is there, just not for numbers 1 and 2 for whatever reason. And here comes Jake "The Snake" Roberts as the crowd goes wild. Hopefully he lasts longer than last year. DiBiase attacks before Jake can get to his feet, and even goes between the ropes, to the outside to attack Jake.

DiBiase tries a Million Dollar Dream but Jake is having none of that and brings the action to the ring. DiBiase's elimination-after-elimination was a pre-cursor to guys like Steve Austin, Diesel, and CM Punk. Jake tries the DDT but is backdropped out of it. The Macho King Randy Savage is next, looking much nuttier than last year. Since the last Rumble, he had lost to Hulk Hogan in the main event of Wrestlemania and snapped, turning full fledged heel. DiBiase and Savage do a little double team effort on Roberts. They sure loved the double axe handle in the late 80's/early 90's. Jake is tied up oin the ropes BUT IT'S ROWDY RODDY PIPER TO MAKE THE SAVE!! Crowd goes ballistic for Piper as Piper dismantles the heels alone. He frees Jake and signals for the DDT. The faces work over the heels and the crowd is molten for it. Nobody can eliminate each other btu the crowd is still all for it, as the Warlord comes out. Hopefully he lasts more than 2 seconds this year.

Indeed, the Warlord has passed the 2 second mark and attacks the faces. Piper fights back against the Warlord and the crowd is loving every punch that Piper throws. The heels try to eliminate Jake, to no avail. The faces take over and here comes the Hitman! A face this year, the crowd is in love with the Hitman, too. What a great crowd. So now we have 3 faces and 3 heels battling each other. Funny, you have three guys in there that could have easily held the WWF Championship and never did, two guys that DID hold the WWF Championship....and the Warlord. Piper and Piper work together here, which makes me want to watch their epic Intercontinental Chamionship match now. Bret tries to eliminate Savage, which makes me want to watch Savage vs. Bret now.

Nobody has been eliminated yet but the action is still exciting, as Bad News Brown makes his way out. So far, no new entrants from the last year. Sure enough, he attacks Bret. Roberts tries the DDT on DiBiase, but Savage sees opportunity and clotheslines Roberts out of the ring. Piper almost takes out DiBiase but Savage saves him. Again here, no heels are fighting each other, and no faces are fighting each other. It sure makes for an interesting opening though, as Bret and Piper play good underdogs. I stand corrected as Bad News Brown goes after DiBiase.

DUTHTY RHODETH! The American Dream comes out to a sizable pop and goes right after the Macho King, foreshadowing their Wrestlemania match. And Dusty backdrops Savage HIGH out of the ring. Dusty tries to assist Piper in eliminating the Warlord but no such luck. The countdown is indeed visible to the audience and here comes Andre the Giant, led by Bobby the Brain Heenan. The Warlord greets him with a few punches but Andre tosses the Warlord out. Smart move, giving Andre some momentum. Mr. Fuji gets on the apron to argue but Heenan pulls him down to a humorous scuffle. As expected, Andre takes control of everyone. The Red Rooster makes his long awaited return to the Royal Rumble (cough), complete with red in his hair. Piper eliminates Bad News Brown, who gets back on the apron and pulls Piper out of the ring. Piper and Bad News brawl, which foreshadows THEIR Wrestlemania VI bout.

Ax is your next entrant as this looks to be the exact same guys from last year, but with a much more exciting audience. It's also booked better. Ax attacks Andre with a choke, giving Andre a taste of his own medicine. Andre can't help himself and gets tied up in the ropes again, as Ax and Dusty work him over. Meanwhile, Bret tries to eliminate DiBiase. Andre is free at last, free at last and Andre's tag team partner, Haku, runs to save the big man. Dusty is impervious to Haku's attacks and knocks him on his ass. Yet, Dusty falls after, and Haku is up first. AND HERE COMES SMASH! And for the third time, this foreshadows ANOTHER Wrestlemania 6 match, in Demolition vs. the Colossal Connection. I love that booking. "The African Dream" Akeem comes out to a resounding chorus of boos. On the other side of the ring, Dusty eliminates Bret Hart, as the announcers have no idea. But Demolition eliminates Andre the Giant and the crowd pops big for that. Sad that the announcers missed it. Speaking of which, I just noticed the Red Rooster is gone, apparently via Andre.

Snuka is the next one out and faces Akeem. And sure enough, Snuka tosses Akeem out. They're cutting the dead weight quicker, thankfully. You still have tough as nails, Haku in there, the team of Demolition, who are working together this year, Dusty Rhodes, and Ted Dibiase. All serve a purpose for being in there and thankfully are staying in there. Dino Bravo is accompanied to the ring next by Jimmy Hart. The action starts to lull a bit but Demolition tries to take out DiBiase which gets the crowd going. Dino Bravo makes the save, sticking to the heels-saving-heels of this match. The Canadian Earthquake makes his Rumble debut and eliminates Dusty Rhodes. Earthquake takes out Ax next. Earthquake's wearing a bright blue singlet with a tiny Canadian flag in the middle of it; this makes me lol.

And here comes Jim Neidhart to a good pop. He goes right after Earthquake but makes little impact on him. Haku and Smash team up with Neidhart though and try to take out Earthquake. Snuka, DiBiase and Bravo join and THERE GOES EARTHQUAKE! First time we see a group of people successfully taking out one guy in the Rumble. Next up is the Ultimate Wariror! Crowd goes nuts for the Warrior, who no-sells offense from Dino Bravo and eliminates him. Hakue, Snuka and Smash try to slow Warrior down. No effect there. Neidhart and Warrior trade off chopping DiBiase, and then attack each other. Rick Martel is out next, as "The Model" instead of a member of Strike Force. Smash is all out of face paint, which makes for a much-less intimidating visual. Just looks like a middle-aged man with an S&M fetish. Haku certainly isn't intimidated, who kicks Smash out. Tito Santana is out next as he goes right after his former tag team partner, Rick Martel. Tito tries to dump Martel but it fails. Sadly, those two did not meet at Wrestlemania 6.

The Honky Tonk Man is your next entrant in the 1990 Rumbe as the ring starts to fill up. Warrior greets Honky with some blows to the face but DiBiase goes for the Warrior. Warrior does manage to dump out Jim Neidhart, and then clothesline Ted DiBiase to a HUGE pop. There goes your number one entrant, who sets the longevity record at 44 minutes and 47 seconds. Hulkamania comes out, who IS the WWF Heavyweight Champion. Hogan clotheslines Snuka out, keeping his momentum going quickly. Haku falls victim to Hogan's 73" pythons (or however big they are). On the other side of the ring, the Ultimate Warrior dumps Tito Santana as the ring has quickly cleared up. Honky works over Hogan with Hogan's own t-shirt around the neck.

Shawn Michaels is number 26, who, for two years in a row, gets a good reaction out of the crowd. Hogan takes out the Honky Tonk Man, and the Ultimate Warrior throws out Shawn Michaels and the Ultimate Warrior. Your Wrestlemania 6 main event are the only two men in the ring as the crowd approves. They should have had Shawn in earlier; they wasted him here. Neither man can get the advantage as the crowd eats this up with a sppon. They criss cross against the ropes which looks a bit silly, but then wind up clotheslining each other. The Barbarian is out next and has easy pickings, as he drops elbows on both men. So they tease the Wrestlemania main event JUST ENOUGH to get the crowd interested but then yank it away so as not to give the audience too much. Ravishing Rick Rude is next, making his Rumble debut. He also ran out before there was any sort of count. The heels try to eliminate Hogan but Warrior makes the save, baffling Jesse Ventura. Next, they try to eliminate Warrior. Hogan tries to make the save by clotheslining both of the heels but Warrior pays the price and falls out.

Hilariously, Warrior jumps back in, attacks both heels, and then runs away. Hercules comes in at number 29. Nothing much happens until Mr. Perfect finaly enters at number 30, singlet in full force this year. The Barbarian goes out via Hercules, Rick Rude takes out Hercules, and we're down to another 2 heels against 1 face, for the third year in a row. Miscommunication allows Perfect to go to the apron, who turns on Rude and pulls the rope down during an irish whip, sending Rude sailing over the top.

Now, realistically, Mr. Perfect could have gotten a huge rub from this encounter. That said, Hogan was the guy, and this match had yet to establish a number one contender for Wrestlemania. Still, Hogan is the WWF Champion at this point and doesn't need this win at all. Furthermore, he sure as hell doesn't need to no-sell the fucking Perfect Plex and destroy Perfect. Hogan hulks up and sends Mr. Perfect out of the ring, winning the whole thing. This marks the only time the WWF Champion would win the Royal Rumble.

The booking should have been different here. Warrior could have used the rub more, and they could have had Warrior "accidentally" eliminate Hogan. Much better effort than last year though all around, with an electric crowd helping out. ***1/2